tinkll1 (tinkll1) wrote,

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20th Anniversary

This really was to have been the first entry until I started showing my wife what I had discovered, and that led to the previos entry, but this was already in the works. My computer had tried, on it's own to edit the entry, to chew it up and vaporize it, but the new Mac OS X recaptured it. So here goes....

My life is just too busy. I’m not really complaining, because I like it. I’m happy. Really, I’m very happy. Most of the time. But, I never seem to have the time to do many of the things that I want to do. There are always the things that have to be done. And, most of them get done. But, there are always the things that I would like to do. And, most of them, seem not to get done!

So, here I am, on Saturday, February 26th, relatively unrushed and uncommitted, and with a little time to be introspective and to write down some thoughts. I guess this is sort of a diary, but it is intended for publication, informally, possibly as the start of a blog. I do apologize if that seems presumptuous to any eventual reader, and it sounds presumptuous to this writer. Do I really have something to say that’s worth reading, and who would possibly read it?

For a starter, it’s for my family and friends. Now, I have a friend or two who might possibly read it, and a lot of friends who are too busy with more important things, kind of like my first paragraph indicates. But, I do have 7 children and 8.5 grandchildren, the one in utero, Myles, a.k.a. Kilometer Elmo, really deserving more than just 0.5 status, but the total count doesn’t add up to 9…. Yet.

I think of what I would have wanted to ask my mother and father, my aunts and uncles, grandparents, 2 of whom I never knew, and I justify this self-indulgence as leaving a paper trail to those who might wish, at sometime, to know me, at least in the fashion that I choose to allow myself to be known. That, in itself, could be revealing. So, here’s an insight into me, and I credit my wife, Lin for this…. As you will probably see, I credit her for a lot.

There’s this huge desire to communicate, to be understood, to be open, like, in the Southern California vernacular, like, who cares? I can’t and don’t want to answer that, but I know a few people who care a lot, and a larger number whom I care about, and who I would like to understand me better. But, all this is preamble, self-conscious, and long winded.

On October 20, 1984, when my youngest daughter, Laurie Victoria, was less than 4 months old, a life-altering event occurred. I went out on a first date with the woman who was to become my wife. That’s a story upon a story, and not for this moment, as I wish to focus on an afternoon, sunny, following a rainy day, at the Turnip Rose – Orange County Medical Association facility, where, to the singing of a Shirley, and a 3 man musical combo playing Ice Castles, a bagpiper playing Scotland the Brave and the Black Bear, and Rabbi Alan Krause providing the cultural-religious context, Linda Ellen Moronovitz Morton Golden, became my wife. That was on February 24, 1985, and that was the start of our life together, formally, and, I feel, my entry into a figurative Garden of Eden, where life has been as close to idyllic as I could imagine.

I must jump, now, 20 years to a very busy Thursday. Afternoon office hours, a patient at St. Joseph Hospital and another at Western Medical Center, Santa Ana, clinic rounds to see dialysis patients, e-mail correspondence, still in the afterglow of the Roosevelt Rough Rider mini-reunion at a kosher Italian restaurant on Wilshire Boulevard with Mark and Michael David Donchin, Paul and June Kraus Finfer, and of course, Lin, the previous day, and looking forward to the USC Trojan/UCLA Bruin basketball game…. Whew, a run-on sentence for a run on life. It was busy. It’s always busy, except, right now.

I came home and Lin had made ginger chicken, from a recipe from our daughter, Becky, and my very favorite salad with avocado, mandarin oranges, sesame like dressing, and even, wine, and all, by candlelight, on our round table in the breakfast room. We had some beautiful roses that Lin had purchased at Costco, a week earlier, for our Chavurah meeting (our group of friends from University Synagogue.) The scene was so lovely that I photographed it. Of course, Lin was quick to say that the red plastic cups needed to be excluded from the romantic scene, as they were intended for our diet colas and did not go well with the crystal wine glasses.

The food was wonderful and the first half of the game, just as wonderful, when wine and food and early rising all caught up with me, and I suggested that we adjourn to the bedroom to watch the rest of the game. The first 10 minutes of the second half continued to go well, and I was enjoying the Bruin domination, when, the next thing I know, they are conducting post game interviews. The Bruins won handily, but I slept through this.

And a little bit later…. Suddenly, it was Friday, and I was left this wonderful warm memory of my wife having sacrificed her romantic dreams to serve me and my Bruin preoccupation. Even I am capable of feeling guilty, under suitable stimulation, and I had a love attack for my wife, a woman who has put up with me for 20 years, and says she loves it! Well, I thought it was overdue to try to provide her with a romantic surprise or 2.

Off I went to rounds, but really I interspersed a trip to the Main Place mall, a music shop where I bought romantic CD’s, a Tom Jones CD, 4 anniversary cards, and a Judith something or other, charm set and bracelet at…. No, not K-mart….. Nordstrom’s. The charms were a heart with a keyhole, a Valentine like envelope that said, ”I love you,” and a an engagement ring and wedding ring, all in malachite and sterling silver, gift wrapped of course.

I then sneaked into the house, past Lin banging away at her computer, and put the cards on the floor, numbered in order and leading to the bed where the bracelet lay on top of the CD’s. I hid behind the chair in the corner, after putting in one of the romantic CD’s in our player and turning up the volume. Then, I called Lin, and started talking to her. She asked if I was home and I didn’t reply, but she came out of her office, down the hall, and found the trail of anniversary cards. She looked around for me but didn’t see me until I jumped up and took a flash photo, unfortunately unfocused, but still capturing the surprise.

This is about as romantic as I get, with presents and surprises, and as thick as it sounds in the telling, it was and is sincere, and Lin loved it. We went off to Ruth Chris’ Steak House and a lovely dinner, for a very special day.

So, now, I’m a blogger. For better or for worse.
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